Rebloggable Butter Reply by request:

Actually if you butter their feet they’ll land properly, the hard part is explaining to your Mom why you spread all the butter on the cat’s paws.  You try to explain it’s for science but she’s already convinced its some messed up sexual thing and then she’ll make you see Dr. Sloane again and all he does is talk and talk and you get one word in edgewise and he interprets it all wrong and gets all Freudian on you and pretty soon the cat is your Father and the butter means you never forgave him for that thing at Swim Camp and why the hell should you, he knew the water was like 30 degrees and he threw you in anyway I mean you could have DIED and Dr. Sloane thinks you have to forgive him but that’s his Christianity talking not his degree and when you mix the two you won’t be a good shrink or a good christian you’ll be just like Louis from Michigan and when’s the last time you even heard from Lewis?  Hmm?  You haven’t because he’s a goddamn junkie now because you wouldn’t support him when he fucking NEEDED you.

And that’s why cats always land butter side up.